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  • Turtle has a smoking habit


    Turtles are creatures of habit, it seems, after one was caught smoking. The pet
    can finish a cigarette in four minutes.


  • Groin man kicked into jail


    A man in Canada has been jailed for approaching seven different women and
    asking them to kick him in the groin.


  • Deer chased into sea by dogs


    A young deer was rescued by a lifeboat crew after it was chased into the sea by
    a pack of angry dogs.


  • Rats: Tony Blair is dead


    Tributes from around the world look set to pour into Britain at the shocking
    news of the death of Tony Blair… the artistic rat.


  • Woman ‘made to remove nipple ring with pliers’


    Airport security staff made a woman take out her nipple ring with pliers before
    she was allowed to board a plane, it has been claimed.


  • Bomb scare just a science project


    Train passengers rushed for the exits when a bomb ‘went off’ – only for the
    scare to be blamed on a student’s science project.


  • ‘Wombat rape victim’ cried wolf


    A man who told police he had been raped by a wombat has, perhaps not
    surprisingly, failed to substantiate his claim in court.


  • Duck-beheader sentenced for duck-beheading


    Man apologises for ripping the head off a live duck in a hotel. Ah, don’t beat
    yourself up, we’ve all done it.


  • ‘I’m hoping to start a new sexuality.’


    The story of the man who built himself a robot girlfriend because it wasn’t
    really working out with human ladies.


  • Woman pulls gun in shoe spat


    Great proportionate responses of our time: pulling a gun on deliverymen because
    they wouldn’t take their shoes off.


  • Aussie promises second Stonehenge


    AUSTRALIA: The original took thousands of years to build – but now an
    Australian entrepreneur wants to knock up a replica Stonehenge in nine months.


  • Man drives car into post office, repeatedly


    Driving one car into a post office may be regarded as misfortune. Driving two
    cars into a post office looks like youre a bit crazy.


  • Twin toilet invented for domestic bliss


    We’ve seen twin sinks and twin baths. Now the latest in domestic bliss is said
    to be… a twin toilet.


  • Man attacks wife with profiteroles, relationship over


    A man has admitted to attacking his wife of eight years by throwing
    profiteroles at her.


  • Jailed for being in park at wrong time


    Most people enjoying spending time in the park relaxing – that is unless your
    name’s William Alfred.

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