Today I am compiling some of the funny definition of stages of life.

The four stages of life
1) You believe in Santa Claus
2) You don’t believe in Santa Claus
3) You are Santa Claus
4) You look like Santa Claus

And following definition also sounds convincing. Don’t you agree that the photo below is a great representation of one’s life?

Four liquid stages of life

• You start with Milk Bottle
• Kids enjoy Pop and Juices
• Young - mid age is dedicated to beer
• And finally at old age the hospital drink would be the one you can have.

Success is:
At age 4 success is . . . . not peeing in your pants
At age 12 success is . . . having friends
At age 16 success is . . . having a drivers license
At age 20 success is . . . having sex
At age 35 success is . . . having money
At age 50 success is . . . having money
At age 60 success is . . . having sex
At age 70 success is . . . having a drivers license
At age 75 success is . . . having friends
At age 80 success is . . . not peeing in your pants

The male stages of life

Age. Seduction lines.

• 17 My parents are away for the weekend.
• 25 My girlfriend is away for the weekend.
• 35 My fiancee is away for the weekend.
• 48 My wife is away for the weekend.
• 66 My second wife is dead.

Age. Favorite sport.

• 17 Sex.
• 25 Sex.
• 35 Sex.
• 48 Sex.
• 66 Napping.

Age. Definiton of a successful date.

• 17 Tongue.
• 25 Breakfast.
• 35 She didn’t set back my therapy.
• 48 I didn’t have to meet her kids.
• 66 Got home alive.

The female stages of life:

Age. Favorite fantasy.

• 17 Tall, dark and hansome.
• 25 Tall, dark and hansome with money.
• 35 Tall, dark and hansome with money and a brain.
• 48 A man with hair.
• 66 A man.

Age. Ideal date.

• 17 He offers to pay.
• 25 He pays.
• 35 He cooks breakfast next morning.
• 48 He cooks breakfast next morning for the kids.
• 66 He can chew his breakfast.

T-shirt design about 4 stages of life - defined in terms of Santa again:

If you are still not satisfied with the definition, this page has nice representation of four more (or is it five?) stages of life. Nice, illustrated four stages of life in internet is also pretty funny.

In this page folklore researcher from southern Utah,Professor D. L. Ashliman, defines the stages of life in terms of folktales.

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